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On Catholic Guilt

For as long as I’ve been a member of the Catholic Church, however unofficially, I have known one simple fact.

I am a horrible Catholic.

I know, I know. Not even two weeks ago I wrote about how I had come to love God. So how am I a horrible Catholic?

As much as I love attending Mass and the people here, I know I disagree with a lot of their ideas. I hear Father Oaks speak about the evils of abortion and I try and sink down into my pew.

I am a full supporter of gay marriage. I was pretty much raised by two lesbians and have been dubbed the lesbian’s equivalent of a fag hag. Throughout high school, I caught a lot of crap for not being quiet on my views about this. Oh, the joys of living in the Bible Belt. On a side note, civil unions remind me too much of what I’ve heard of the “seperate yet equal” policies.

Before I move on, I’d like to say good job to the state of Connecticut.

Premarital sex, I’m sorry but I love sex. I’m not going to deny this. I don’t sleep around but should I get married, I won’t be up there as a virgin. This is pretty much why I also think contraceptives are amazing.

Despite the fact I personally get ill thinking of abortion, I recognize that there are health reasons that make it a real option. So for that reason, I am Pro-Choice. Which has caused some rather uncomfortable debates with my friends.

Thus the phenomena I call Catholic guilt. I have had less understanding Christians tell me that I am going to Hell for my views and if that’s the case, then at least I’m prepared.

(image courtesy of atickettohell.com)

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  1. Tricia
    October 14, 2008 at 2:02 AM

    Waaaaaaayyyyy over on the other end of the religion spectrum is me. We’re so different, yet so much the same. I feel that same guilt ALL. THE. TIME.

    And I’m a Baptist! Go figure!

  2. January 23, 2009 at 4:39 AM

    I married two ex-Catholics, not at the same time, of course. My ex had converted to Catholicism when he was in the Navy so he hadn’t been indoctrinated with guilt from childhood. My current husband had grown up in a strict Catholic family with an Irish Catholic mother. Irish Catholic mothers and Jewish mothers are equally good when it comes to instilling guilt. I grew up Protestant and my parents put plenty of guilt trips on me, too.

    But now, my ex (at least the last time I saw him —20 years ago) and my current husband, and I are all nonreligious. It is an amazing feeling not to have someone (parents. ministers, priests. the Bible) preaching guilt at me all the time. I am responsible for my actions, and sometimes I am guilty of various acts, like thoughtlessness. I make plenty of mistakes. But instead of praying for forgiveness, I try to right my wrong and/or ask the wronged party to forgive me. And I try to learn from my mistakes and do better the next time. Leaving religion behind was very liberating for me.

    I understand why people are religious. The music, the rituals, the community of like-minded people, and the promise of an afterlife are very comforting. It’s just not for me.

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