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Forward

“Put your money where your mouth is.”

We all heard it growing up. We all know it’s one thing to talk about doing something and quite another to actually “grow a pair” as it were and do it.

The three of us stood in the parking lot. All unsure, one concerned for the other two. The brunette eyed both me and the blond. She entwines an arm with us both and holds a hand, lending support and an almost palpable feeling of pride. I take a deep breathe and start walking, the others falling into step with me as we make our way inside the building.

The walls are covered with pictures and posters  with several groups of people, mostly women, milling about.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” In the back of my mind, I note just how strange (and touching) it is to hear how concerned this normally tough as nails woman is for us.

As we had talked about it at length for a few weeks, the blond speaks–answering for the two of us. “No but we’re pretty sure we need to do this.”

We move towards the front desk, where the receptionist gives us an odd glance. I know I look out of place here but in all honesty, had much more important things to worry about. I give her our names, the two of us showing ID as requested, and tell her we have interviews scheduled.

She waves me and the blond through to the back and the brunette gives us each a quick hug before letting us go.

The woman we are here to see cannot be more than 30. Copper hair, pulled up into a bun and warm brown eyes. She beckons us to sit down and introduces herself before saying she had been looking  forward to meeting us. She puts us at ease like a professional, this woman is obviously talented at her job. She tells us her story. She then asks the blond for hers.

Her mouth opens and she tells it. I hold her hand as she sits beside me. Her voice never once wavers but her hand squeezes mine to the point of pain. She finishes and turns to me, flashing a grateful smile. I return it before facing this woman behind the desk. I begin my own story, pushing down the emotion rising in my throat.

She looks at us for a long moment before asking why we want these volunteer positions.

I look her dead in the eye and say, “because we know what these people are dealing with. We want to help as no one should ever have to deal with this alone. And maybe, we’ll finally be able to help ourselves in the process.”

She steeples her hands before smiling.

Her next question is to ask when we can start training.

We all shake hands before the two of us head back into the lobby where the brunette waits. She doesn’t ask how things went, the relief on our faces is answer enough. As we’re walking away, I look back at the building. The words “Crisis Center” seem to leap back at me from across the lot. The surrealism of the situation I just found myself in gives me pause.

I shake my head to clear it.

The blond is laughing at a joke the brunette just made.

I smile.

And we move on.

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  1. Tinkerbell
    March 30, 2009 at 10:14 AM

    I am proud of you.

    Thank you darlin’.

  2. March 30, 2009 at 3:20 PM

    I always wanted to.

    I suppose it’s not too late, is it?

    Nope. If that were true, i wouldn’t have bothered.

  3. March 31, 2009 at 1:03 PM

    good for you. pain is something that we can use not only to make ourselves stronger, but to help other people become stronger too.

    i’m glad that something positive came out of the hurt. i’m glad that you are doing this. for your self, and for others.

    you’re a strong person, and i have faith in you. well done.

    i’m glad to *know* you.

    -Blush- Thank you.

  4. March 31, 2009 at 4:11 PM

    Damn this is well written. Nicely done! I’m also so happy to see you’re taking something so negative and doing something more positive with it. Great step in healing!

    My friend said it best when she said she hoped that this was a step towards nightmare-free sleep. All I know is that this is going to be quite the experience. Hopefully one with positive results.

  5. courtney903
    April 1, 2009 at 6:52 PM

    i like this post a lot.

    a lot.

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